A Little More Social: How Small Choices Create Unexpected Happiness, Health, and Connection

We know that social connection enriches our lives—so why do we hesitate to connect?

“One of those rare books that might actually change your life.” —Daniel Gilbert, New York Times bestselling author of Stumbling on Happiness

There is a paradox at the core of human life. We are a highly social species uniquely equipped to connect with other people and doing so is better for us. Yet we so often choose to be unsocial. We avoid talking to the stranger who sits next to us. We struggle to move beyond small talk with an acquaintance. We are reluctant to express our gratitude to people we appreciate. Every day, we avoid opportunities to connect with strangers, neighbors, colleagues, friends, and family. By missing those moments, we miss out on all the benefits of a more social life—one that is happier and healthier for everyone.

University of Chicago psychologist and author of Mindwise, Nicholas Epley has spent his career studying the way we connect, and he has found that our social fears often keep us from reaching out. But Epley shows us how to seize the small moments with insights such as:

Social connection is a choice we make based on expectations about how others will respond to us—expectations that tend to be overly pessimistic.
Introverts and extroverts alike benefit from choosing to be a little more social.
Mistaken expectations can cause us to avoid interacting in ways that create strong connections—such as having a conversation—in favor of less satisfying interactions—such as social media or texting.
While many books promise one big fix, making a habit of small connections is much more likely to improve your life.
The habits and practices that Epley advocates are approachable. The beauty of this book is that small acts have an outsized impact on the most important parts of our lives.

Bridging the gap between two people is easier than we think, and success more likely, if we choose to be a little more social.

Nicholas Epley is the John Templeton Keller Distinguished Service Professor of Behavior Science and Director of the Center for Decision Research at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business. He studies social cognition—how thinking people think about other thinking people—to understand why well-meaning people so routinely misunderstand each other. He teaches an ethics and wellbeing course to MBA students called Designing a Good Life.

His research has been featured by the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, CNN, Wired, and National Public Radio, among many others, and has been funded by the National Science Foundation and the Templeton Foundation. He has been awarded the 2008 Theoretical Innovation Award from the Society for Personality and Social Psychology, the 2011 Distinguished Scientific Award for Early Career Contribution to Psychology from the American Psychological Association, the 2015 Book Prize for the Promotion of Social and Personality Science, and the 2018 Career Trajectory Award from the Society for Experimental Social Psychology. Epley was named a "professor to watch" by the Financial Times, one of the "World's Best 40 under 40 Business School Professors" by Poets and Quants, and one of the 100 Most Influential in Business Ethics by Ethisphere.

He is the author of Mindwise: How We Understand What Others Think, Believe, Feel, and Want (2014), and A Little More Social: How Small Choices Create Unexpected Happiness, Health, and Connection (2026). He lives with his family in Chicago.

“Nicholas Epley’s work is brilliant, fascinating and—particularly now—vitally important. Why do we, the most social species, often choose silence over connection? In A Little More Social, Epley shows us that our happiness, health, and longevity hinge on human connection—even though we underestimate the power of simply saying hello. Drawing on a decade of groundbreaking research and personal stories, Epley demonstrates how small acts of connection create profound results. Everyone should read this beautiful book—and learn to use the transformative power of reaching out to build a more meaningful life.” —Charles Duhigg, New York Times bestselling author of Supercommunicators and The Power of Habit

“A Little More Social explores the power and promise of the human connections that most of us never make—but could make so easily if we just opened our eyes. This is the eye-opener. Insightful, engaging, scientifically grounded and beautifully written, A Little More Social is one of those rare books that might actually change your life.” —Daniel Gilbert, New York Times bestselling author of Stumbling on Happiness

“I love this book! Truly, A Little More Social might change your life. A manifesto for our time, it explains why so many of us are substituting typing for talking, solitude for socializing, and one-to-many posting for one-on-one conversation. Beautifully written, meticulously crafted, and winningly earnest. It’s a masterclass in social connection!” —Angela Duckworth, New York Times bestselling author of Grit

"We all know to beware of what we wish for, but Epley shows that the opposite may also be true: beware of what you don’t wish for, because you could be missing out on deep satisfaction. It’s a profound insight from an expert on what we don’t know about ourselves, and is particularly timely in an age of increasing isolation. This book promises much happiness at a small personal cost." —Steven Pinker, Johnstone Professor of Psychology at Harvard University and author of When Everyone Knows That Everyone Knows…

"Elegantly written and backed with actionable tips, A Little More Social is an essential guide for finding the tiny moments of connection that matter more than we think for our health and happiness. Epley’s book is the hopeful wake-up call we all need to feel better in our increasingly disconnected world.” —Laurie Santos, Chandrika and Ranjan Tandon Professor of Psychology at Yale University and host of The Happiness Lab podcast

“Brilliant, eye-opening, and deeply practical, A Little More Social will change how you think about everyday connection. Nick Epley reveals why we so often hold back from the very social connections that would make us happier and healthier—and how tiny, intentional choices can transform our daily lives. A Little More Social is smart, surprising, and brimming with insights about how to reach out, overcome our self-imposed walls, and rediscover the joy of being human.” — Sonja Lyubomirsky, Distinguished Professor of Psychology, University of California, Riverside, and author of The How of Happiness and How to Feel Loved

“In A Little More Social, world-renowned behavioral scientist Nicholas Epley masterfully blends cutting-edge research with unforgettable stories to reveal how small acts of connection can make your life richer and happier. This brilliant, humane, and inspiring book will forever change how you see and reach out to other people.” —Katy Milkman, author of How to Change

“With science-backed research, Epley offers fresh insights into the causes of our self-constructed barriers and provides commonsense and applicable ways to break them down.” —Booklist